In Search of the North Pole
by Lily Lindsey-Aubrey
Summary: Captain Jack and crew decide that it's time that Father Christmas visited the Caribbean. Written as part of the Fan Fiction Christmas Countdown. Day 7.


**_Previous version of this story did not have the location of the next story in the FFCC. It is called 'Gift Receipts Required' and can be found on ccgaylord's profile page. :)_**

_Author's Note: This is part seven of the Fan Fiction Christmas Countdown. If you haven't already read the other parts, I suggest you do, as this ties in with them somewhat. The first one is also written by me, and is entitled 'The Iron Hills Mall'. It's a Hobbit fan fic. _

_Here are the replies to last time's reviews:  
><strong>OneSizeFitsAll<strong>: I don't know. Let's not think about it...  
><em>_**Thalion Estel**: Yes, Berk isn't a very safe place to live... You're welcome. Thanks for reviewing!  
><em>_**ThurinRanger**: You've seen all these movies? Good for you! They're all great movies...with the exception of Frozen, maybe...  
><em>_**Melkor'sOnlyLieutenant**: Yes, Astrid has problems. :P  
><em>_**2MFriedmanFreak**: See below...  
><em>_Thanks all of you for reviewing! You're all awesome! -ccgaylord_

_I'm going to give a short list of characters so that those participating in the FFCC event who haven't seen PotC before can follow it a little better. Those fortunates who have seen the movies can skip this part. This is only based off of the first movie._

Will Turner- a blacksmith; also viewed by some to be a pirate. In love with Elizabeth Swann.

Elizabeth Swann- the daughter of the governor of a small town in the Caribbean. In love with Will Turner.

Jack Sparrow- pirate. Insists on being called Captain… oops… Tends to sink ships and save bullets, and do other pirate-y things.

Captain Norrington- Captain in the Royal Navy, stationed in the Caribbean. He hates pirates and hates Jack Sparrow. He is in love with Elizabeth Swann for some weird reason.

**In Search of the North Pole**

_On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love sent to me seven Swanns a-swimming… _

Excerpts from Captain Jack Sparrow's travel journal

_December 1st, 1642_

I have thought deeply, and have come at last to the conclusion that it is of the utmost importance that I go seek what I've been waiting for to come to me for my whole life.

I have decided to go find the North Pole and meet Father Christmas.

It's not fair, you know, that he never has come to the Caribbean, at least not in my lifetime. Or maybe he's just prejudiced against pirates and pirates-to-be. Because never once in my whole life has he given me one present.

So I have purposed to go out and find him. I will force him to treat all people, pirates and otherwise, equal.

_December 2nd, 1642_

I have developed a slight problem.

Having purposed to carry out my plan, I wanted to start immediately. But I had barely left shore when my crew started complaining.

I would ditch them, you know, but I rather need a crew. So I can't.

But I wish I'd gone with a better crew than what I have. I was in such a hurry to start that I didn't want to take the time. But of all the bad crews in the Caribbean, Will Turner and Elizabeth Swann make up the worst.

As I was saying, I had barely left shore when they started complaining. It so happens that neither of them liked the idea of sailing up to the North Pole.

I wasn't about to let them get away with not working just because they didn't want to, though. So I exerted myself and insisted on their cooperation. No more complaints have been made since I drew my pistol.

_December 4th, 1642_

All is going well. My landlubber crew is slowly adjusting to ship life, and no one has been making protests about how cold it will be or how hard it will be to find Father Christmas. I think I'm rather good at managing them.

Will did, once, dare to question my judgement about the direction we were heading in. He says it's South, not North. His problem is he trusts the sun more than he trusts my compass. The idiot.

I had to tie up Eli

_December 12th, 1642_

I was interrupted when last I wrote by the sound of cannon fire. My horrible crew had, apparently, not seen the pirate ship approaching. We had to run, much as Captain Jack Sparrow hates running, in order to preserve our lives, because the other ship was much bigger than ours.

Then we ran into more trouble. A storm came up, blew us miles off course, and left us stranded in the middle of the Atlantic ocean. Will says it's the Pacific. He's so stupid.

We seem to be stuck in the doldrums, though, and that's not good.

To continue what I was writing last time, I had to tie Elizabeth Swann up for several hours until she agreed to behave and swab the deck. She doesn't like manual labour.

_December 20th, 1642_

My crew begins to worry that we won't make it to the North Pole in time for isn't too put-out; he says it's better to arrive at sometime when Father Christmas won't be so busy. Elizabeth, however, was in tears. She worries that at other times of year he won't be in as good a mood. My opinion is that if Captain Jack Sparrow says he's going to the North Pole for Christmas, then he's going to the North Pole for Christmas, and an end to it!

We are now, according to me, finally North of the equator again (we found that we'd gone considerably more South than we intended during the storm when we landed at what we thought was Africa but turned out to be Brazil). We are now, according to _Will,_ still going South, in the Pacific ocean. If his stupid map is correct, then we're about to run into some unknown island.

I think he drew his map himself.

_December 30th, 1642_

Needless to say, Elizabeth and Will are both very angry at me. We did not get to the North Pole in time (in fact, we are still in a place that is quite hot. Maybe we haven't been moving at all…).

Oh, and I forgot to mention the last entry, our ship is about to sink. I think I can make it to a dock.

Maybe.

_January 17th, 1643_

I did it! I'm amazing.

So we have a new ship now. It isn't nearly as nice as my old one, but at least it floats. And I bought it from a friend, so I'm supporting a good person. Well, he's a pirate, but at least I know how bad he is.

Oh, yes, we're back in the Caribbean. Apparently we hadn't gotten very far. The first dock we came to was the one we started out at.

Bummer.

_February 2nd, 1643_

When we docked I didn't give the two idiots a chance to abandon ship. I had them tied up in the hold the whole time. I'm not about to give up on this quest. I'm going to find Father Christmas if it kills me. And them.

So here we are, back in the Atlantic travelling North. (Will still insists that we're in the Pacific going South. I think he's dyslexic.) I think we'll get there by next year.

_Twenty pages and three years later…_

_June 5th, 1666_

We just had a strange occurrence. Not that those are unusual. But we were passing right by Scotland when out of the mist loomed a huge pile of burning debris. We narrowly missed it. That idiot Turner insisted on steering us and if it hadn't been my split-second reaction of grabbing the wheel we would've burst into flames and sunk along with the pile of wood.

As we left it behind I looked back and saw it sink and sizzle out. Curious and odd.

I never liked Scotland.

_Another six pages and one year later… _

_December 25th, 1667_

Still no sign of the Polar ice cap. Very disappointing. But we'll push through this.

My day, despite being clouded with the thought of another year gone by without Father Christmas, was brightened by what happened to Elizabeth. She leaned too far over the side of my ship and toppled head over heels into the sea. It only got better, though, because Will sacrificially threw himself after her. But he forgot that he's not the best swimmer.

I got to sit there laughing while they struggled to climb back up. In the end Elizabeth had to drag _him _up, because she was better at swimming.

They were mad at me. That goes without even being said. They're always mad at me. Every time we dock they threaten to desert, so I just tie them up in the hold.

Well, now they've both got colds. It's not surprising; it's getting colder, despite what Will says. He still is insistent that we are in the South Pacific and worries hours on end that we'll hit his island.

_August 30th, 1668_

I'm so sick of this. We just hit ice. Now we're stuck. We can't get out of the stupid stuff. If we don't move soon we'll all freeze to death.

_September 3rd, 1668_

Worst day ever.

We were happily stuck in the ice, pondering what to do next, when Norrington the idiot barged in and demanded that we let him save us from the inevitable doom of freezing to death.

I hate him.

So now we are on his ship being taken back to the Caribbean. Elizabeth and Will are delighted.

I hate them.

I'm chained up in the hold. Of all the stupid, idiotic people, Norrington is the worst stupidest idioticest. All this I go through to find Father Christmas and all I get is getting thrown in jail again.

I hate Father Christmas.

_September 4th, 1668_

I will not give up. I will never give up. I will find this Father Christmas if it kills me.

So I have escaped. Very niftily. I'm a genius. I am now on my way across the freezing cold ice with nothing but my notebook and a pen. A storm is coming.

_September 6th, 1668_

The strangest thing happened today. I thought I'd been going in circles, but I guess not.

I finally met Father Christmas. He was just as I had always pictured him: fat and old and ugly. And he said the meanest thing imaginable.

'Jack Sparrow,' he said.

'Captain,' I corrected coldly.

'Er, Captain. You have been a very bad boy this year. No presents for you.'

'Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat.' I screamed.

'Goodbye Jack- er, Captain Jack. Be better next year.' And Father Christmas toddled off at full speed across the snowy tundra.

I HATE FATHER CHRISTMAS.

_December 28th, 1668_

lol did cap jack actually write all this lol i so am going to sue him for libel tho he totally misused me in this thing i should totally show this to Elizabeth she'd get so mad lol but he's such an idiot lol that wasn't father Christmas xD that was just Elizabeth's dad dressed up lol we made him to because we didn't want him to keep trying to find the north pole xD well anyway it worked lol

will

the end

_I beg pardon for the OOC-ness of the characters. I do not own Disney, Johnny Depp, Orlando Bloom, the gold medallion, or the idea. I don't even own the movie. :P Almost all credit goes to the person who invented the characters (whoever that may be...) _


End file.
